Relationships and Eating Disorders
Healthy relationships are like the tides: they ebb and flow, especially when it comes to verbal interaction. You get together with a friend who has a new love interest – the entire conversation is devoted to this important topic. Conversely, you meet with that same individual a week later and now you have news that takes center stage. But most of the time, it's back and forth, give and take, which is why it is called a dialogue.
However, if your friend gets an eating disorder, balance is very hard to maintain. This is because these disorders are by definition egocentonic; this means that the disorder is all important, and therefore, the individual becomes highly self absorbed. Consider this: if anorexia was a real-life person, she would be a huge celebrity, bathed in brilliant lights on an enormous stage, demanding all focus, all attention, be on her.
What should a person do when an eating disorder enters a friendship, or love relationship? There are many suggestions and guidelines revealed in subsequent articles, such as listening, conveying compassion, extending help, etc. But whether a friend or a significant other, keep in mind that you are important too and your needs also have value.
Remember...Relationships need balance. If you have a relationship with someone suffering from anorexia or bulimia, extend love to them, and to yourself. If you need additional help in coping with the situation, you may consider a support group. Until your eating disordered friend achieves recovery, her primary love interest -- strange as it may seem – will remain her eating disorder.
Discover more about this important topic by checking out the following articles.
Articles
Body Dissatisfaction in Women with Eating Disorders: Relationship to Early Separation Anxiety and Insecure Attachment
Published by: The Official Journal of the American Academy of Pediatrics
Technically written, but important information! It has been suggested that an insecure style of attachment may be one of the factors implicated in the etiology of body dissatisfaction, which, in turn, is a risk factor for eating disorders...Read More
Anorexia and Isolation: How Anorexia Seems to Eliminate the Need for Others
By: By Matthew Tiemeyer, About.com
Those struggling with anorexia nervosa and other eating disorders often drift into isolation because they allow friendships to weaken (or to end completely). The loss of relationship corresponds to the loss of food intake.... Read More
Resources
Tips for Talking To A Friend Who May Have an Eating Disorder: Approaching a friend who has an eating disorder requires compassion and loving support(Nationaleatingdisorders.org)
Building & Communicating with a Treatment Team: Ins and outs of dealing with the healing professionals that work with the eating disorder sufferer(Bulimia.com).
Intervention Tips for School Counselors: School counselors are often the first to be informed of an individuals struggles with an eating disorder. Read about the suggestions for a positive intervention(Findarticles.com)
Communication Skills in Relationships: Misunderstanding and hurt feelings go hand-in-hand with eating disorders. Learn how to communicate in ways that strengthen the relationship with an ed sufferer(Stress.about.com).
